Beyond the Hormone Story: A Broader View of Midlife
It’s not just menopause
HRT. Supplements. Hormone-balancing programs. The modern menopause industry promises quick fixes for midlife women, neatly packaging our experience into a set of symptoms to be managed. But here's what nobody's talking about: the real midlife journey is far richer – and more complex – than hormone changes alone.
At 49, standing on the threshold of my fifties, I've watched the menopause conversation evolve dramatically over the past decade. While greater awareness has been liberating, something crucial is getting lost in the noise: this stage of life isn't just a medical transition to be 'fixed.' It's a profound intersection of physical changes, life responsibilities, and personal transformation.
Let me tell you why this matters.
It’s more than menopause.
Our midlife experience and challenges aren’t JUST about the menopause.
And they can’t all be medicated away. Or supplemented. Or ‘4 week hormone balance programme’d away.
I don’t think we should have menopause as a millstone around our necks for the 10 years or so of transition pre-menopause, to perimenopause, to our post menopause selves.
There’s a complex reality to the midlife transition
Midlife is full of challenges. Some of them can’t be fixed with HRT.
Yes, the impact of changing hormones on our energy, mood, joints, focus, health, sleep and a myriad of other issues is HUGE.
AND it’s different for everyone. As is the action you can take.
AND HRT can be a game changer for managing aspects of hormone change.
The Multiple Challenges of Midlife Women
Most women are still working, or caring for others, at this point in their lives. Not all midlife women are mothers, but they might have kids, teens or adult children needing support. Many will have parents needing extra support as they age.
We are often at a relatively high level in our chosen fields and juggling multiple responsibilities at the same time.
More women in their 40s and 50s are likely to face their own health challenges, or those of their partners or parents.
We might be facing relationship breakdown, or changing financial status for any of the above reasons!
And all of this is relevant and important.
And it impacts our hormones too. This blog might help if you’d like a quick stress reduction tip.
The Menopause Industry: Progress and Pitfalls
I first heard the term perimenopause over 10 years ago. I did my first training in menopause health 8 years ago. I’ve watched the landscape of menopause change dramatically since then. There’s more awareness, more support (if you know where to look for it) and less shame.
AND it’s also turned into a multi billion dollar industry.
Supplements, clothing, diets, fitness regimes, foodstuffs, books, online programmes, menopause clinics.
Promises of magic pills and transformations.
But the thing is, it’s not JUST menopause.
A magic pill might help some of your symptoms, or help you feel better because you’re doing ‘something’.
But if you’re over stretched, overwhelmed, people pleasing, struggling with confidence and direction, you may well need more.
I will go on and on about the impact of living in a patriarchy on women’s wellbeing. Around expectations of women that keep us small, quiet, and amenable.
But one of the major shifts of changing oestrogen levels is that it’s harder to do that. We are losing the hormone that supports our nurturing side.
When Greg Wallace made a comment recently about ‘middle class women of a certain age’ he inspired rage, AND a sense of ‘yep, that’s me, I don’t want to take this misogynistic bull**** anymore’. I was sorely tempted to get a t-shirt…
Identity and Transformation in Midlife
I’ll be 50 next year.
I’m looking forward to it.
I’m not yet at menopause. I’m not currently taking HRT. But I am managing my lifestyle and stress levels carefully.
When I first started teaching and coaching women around the menopause I’d just turned 40.
And if I look back at my approach then I wince a little.
It was still an holistic approach to stress, movement, nutrition and sleep, and an open minded oversight on HRT. And what I learnt and applied to my own habits and health have definitely helped my transition through perimenopause to an extent.
However.
I think there’s a depth to this transition that I had underestimated.
Midlife is a time in which we can also feel a little lost, as life changes, as we find challenges to energy, sleep and health we’ve never faced before.
We lose some of our previous ‘who am I’ clarity as body and brain seem to defy us.
If we allow it, though, it’s an incredible opportunity to redefine who we are.
And think about who we want to be, the impact we want to have on the world in this new beginning, AND how we will nurture, support, and empower ourselves to do so.
If we can, it's a really good time to dial in support. Of good friends, a coach, or counsellor, a peer group of some kind, and yes, your GP or other medical practitioner.
Building Your Support System
Menopause isn’t an end, it’s a new beginning
Getting the right support in place helps us through. It can be a life-changer.
Our post menopause life can be our ‘second spring’. As the Chinese say (and I’d highly recommend Kate Codrington’s book Second Spring for a positive and empowering approach to the menopause transition!)
To survive and thrive this part of the rollercoaster on our terms we MUST make ourselves a priority in a different way. Take care of ourselves from the inside out.
Our brain and heart health should take priority over our fear of aging. Exercise and nourishment, sleep, and stress management being KEY.
I am pretty sure I read somewhere that women are happier in their 50s and beyond, so I’m holding on to that. The last 5 years have been pretty challenging.
But happiness must assume a relatively healthy 50s, energy, good sleep,lack of pain, and a good network of support.
We’re all different but there are some essentials, and health must be an element of that. How can we build our support system to maintain that?
Community and connection are a vital part of supporting our health. What groups, communities, and support structures do you have around you?
I find mine through my business networking, a coaches ‘book club’, my life and business coaches, my fitness communities, my family and friends. And I know it will keep evolving.
The Path to Long-Term Wellbeing Starts Here
In midlife we get an opportunity beyond menopause
It’s a chance to have a long term impact on our health by making good habits a priority. We can take health for granted in our 20s, even our 30s, but our 40s and 50s change that and how we age well starts there.
I see my Dad in his 80s going for 20 mile bike rides and planning walking weekends with his pals. I see my Step Mum who has terminal cancer but still plays golf, walks with the local Ramblers group, and takes part in multiple groups, committees and social networks locally.
And I see that they were fit and active all the way through midlife and beyond.
Starting your journey to life long wellbeing: a practical example.
Where do you start if you want to thrive post menopause?
Start small. Work out the most important priority for you right now - is it to improve your sleep, manage stress and mood, or to move more?
See which of these questions resonate with you, and pick one to work on. Just 1!
For example, if sleep is a struggle, what’s in the way?
Is it getting to sleep, or waking up in the night?
How do you feel when you’re struggling?
Are you getting enough rest during the day? If you added in 30 minutes of downtime in the late afternoon/early evening, would that help?
Are you drinking enough water? Relying on caffeine to get you through the day can have an impact on ‘sleep pressure’ and make it harder to get off to sleep. Dehydration can be felt as a stressor by the body.
Are you eating close to bedtime? If your body is digesting food or processing alcohol in the night, you’re less likely to enter deep rest.
Are you getting out in daylight? In the winter months it can be easy to spend most of our days under electric light which doesn’t help as much with our sleep/wake cycle?
Are you switching off screens before bed?
Which of these feels most relevant? Or helpful?
Or perhaps sleep isn't the issue. My free download has a host of other suggestions - as well as a brief overview of what perimenopause actually is!