Covid, Perimenopause and the power of rest

Having Covid gave me some interesting insights into my perimenopause experience, boundaries and the need for rest. 

Insights that I thought you might find helpful. It’s a bit of a personal one, but I hope that you might find some insights from my experience helpful. 

As you may know, I managed to contract the dreaded Covid-19 virus in mid-October. With two children at school and the virus rampaging through our local community I suppose it was almost inevitable.  Pandemic bingo achieved!

I’m not here to discuss the ins and outs of my approach to the virus, or to give you quick tips on recovery. I’m still in that process myself, and it’s certainly not my place to offer it anyway.

But the enforced rest was interesting.

I allowed the progress of symptoms and the process of recovery to be fascinating (which is a privilege not everyone has, I know.)

And I think there’s some really important learning about our approach to perimenopause and managing our perimenopause symptoms. 

Rest is super important but we have deep cultural conditioning that makes it hard to do well. 

I frequently talk about rest on my social media channels and it’s value for perimenopause. 

Perimenopause often coincides with a very stressful time in our lives (work, children, ageing parents, multiple commitments, full and busy lives). Declining hormone levels make us more stress sensitive and stress also upsets hormone balance so we can get stuck in an unhelpful stress cycle.

I have some restful and restorative practices built into my life - regular meditation, early nights, weekend naps, diving into a fiction book for a whole day (my favourite!), restorative yoga poses.

But I find it really hard to do absolutely nothing. 

It’s like my rest has to be proactive and ‘doing’. Even if the doing is a meditation or a breathing exercise or a walk in the woods.

With Covid, I had a day and a half where even reading was an effort. Where walking upstairs was an effort. Swapping lying on the bed for the sofa was an effort. 

So much of the messaging I’d received around the virus was about the power of rest. Allowing my immune system and my body to do its job. My smart watch was telling me how hard my body was working even lying down.

But the messages in my head were about how lazy I was being. 

About the need to entertain the children and get them off screens, about how I could use the isolation period to catch up on a course I’ve been studying or the 3 books I was half way through reading!

But I couldn’t.

I simply had to listen to that inner voice and ask it to pipe down so that I could obey the messages my body was trying to give me and rest.

And do you know what? It felt good.

To let go, stare into space, acknowledge what was going on in my body with curiosity. To let my mind wander. 

It reminded me that rest and ‘nothing’ creates space. For healing and growth. But also for new ideas, new ways of doing things. 

The perimenopause to post menopause transition is an opportunity for so much transformation, but only if we allow the space to make it happen. 

To slow down and rest and listen to the messages our body is giving us - in the symptoms we experience, in the changes to our cycles, 

Our body often knows what it needs, we just need to slow down enough to listen. 

I have to say, I felt a bit let down by my immune system. I rarely get ill. I have a cold every 3-5 years. I am not sure I’ve ever had the flu. I had just been through my group gut health re-set with clients. I felt like I was in good shape.

But I was also exhausted. I had been managing my Mum’s house move and doing a lot of the physical labour as well as managing logistics and supporting her mental wellbeing through the process. 

I had given myself a ‘day off’ to recover and thought that would be enough. My ‘day off’ was at home and also involved school runs, laundry, cooking and shopping (and an early morning fitness class). 

I had an internal dialogue that was telling me plenty of other people do hard things all the time, who am I to think I deserve a rest. 

Covid made me rest. 

And it helped me to (again) recognise that that inner voice doesn’t necessarily have my best interests at heart. 

How do we slow down and listen in perimenopause? And how does it help us manage our symptoms? 

When we rest we allow space and insight. When we rush about and fill our days we can easily miss the signs of exhaustion and depletion. The physical and mental signs of stress.

For example, I actually sleep better and more deeply when I am well rested. Rest promotes deeper sleep. And sleep is often a big issue in perimenopause.

When I am well rested I make better choices for my perimenopausal wellbeing. 

I’ll get up and do some yoga (an important balance to my running and strength work).

Planning and cooking meals feels more joyful and I am more creative in the kitchen. This means I have a more balanced diet, more balanced energy, plenty of fibre and a variety of nutrients. I won’t reach for snacks and sugar if I’m well rested and satisfied with tasty meals. 

When I am well rested I am more creative and inspired.

Being well rested does actually make me more productive. I don’t think that’s the best reason to rest, but it is a side effect. I’ll be able to write a blog post, create resources for my clients, write great social media posts. Brain fog and losing words is less of an issue (a common perimenopause AND post-covid issue). 

When I am more well rested all my relationships benefit

Better connected to myself, is better connected to others. I’m not bending over backwards to help them first, I’m able to have boundaries and to help them hold their own boundaries. My clients, children, partner, friends and wider family will all feel the benefits.

Rest is often where I start in my work with one to one clients. 

Stress often underpins their perimenopause symptom experience. So rest and calming the nervous system are an effective place to effect change. 

As we step into the busy festive season plus cold and flu season, I’d like to encourage you to build rest in. 

Your body, hormones, family and work will all benefit.

I’m offering a winter wellbeing coaching programme. 4 sessions over 6 weeks to support your perimenopause wellbeing this winter. By Zoom or in walking coaching sessions in Ashton Court, Bristol. 

Get to the end of 2021 feeling clear on your wellbeing priorities and ready to tackle whatever 2022 has to throw at you. 

Book in a quick strategy call now to find out if it’s right for you.